This morning I had a meltdown at church. I went to the rest room, collected myself, and then went back in and cried some more. Maybe it was all the singing about taking my last breath and being with the Lord and all, but it made me think of my mom.
Tomorrow would have been her 95th birthday. For years she celebrated it on the 21st since she was told that was the date when she was born. However, when she needed to apply for Social Security, she had to get her birth certificate and have it translated to English. She was born on the 22nd! Seems for 60 some years she had the wrong date! Back in 1919, mom was born at home and was delivered slightly after midnight.
It is a cute story.
After church, the pastor's wife (and my friend) came up to me to see what was wrong.
We talked. I told her besides grieving, I often wished that I had a disease that I could just get some treatment for or have an operation and be done with it. But noooooooooo!
This is how I am and will most likely always be. It is not enough that I have had to battle Crohn's Disease, have had intensive surgery, have stage IV Kidney Disease. I suffer with depression and that gets pretty darn sickening! I am sick of going back and forth with medication. I just want to be normal.
It seems we all have something and must suffer as long as we live in this world.
Today I wanted to be with Jesus.