About Me

My photo
I have spent a great deal of my life battling illness. I suffered from Crohn's Disease and eventually had abdominal surgery, thwarting the Crohn's and budding cancer cells. Since my surgery in 1995 I have been relatively free from Crohns', although I had several subsequent surgeries related to my ileostomy..When my disease was in remission, I don't think my husband realized how bad it could get, but he has stood by me. I also have suffered from various autoimmune disorders and am diagnosed with Stage IV Kidney Disease. Fortunately, I am maintaining and do not need dialysis at this point. We adopted our son and later found out he had cerebral palsy, so he became my career. Dan has had two surgeries and tons of therapy and is able to walk because of it. He is a college graduate and is employed as an Information Specialist. We are very proud of his accomplishements. I am now part of the retired generation and still getting used to the idea. I do enjoy crafting, traveling and being with family and friends. I am active in my church and feel that the hardships we endure are there to build our faith. I like to live life in the "now" as we never know how much time is left.

Saturday, February 27, 2016

That's all I Know!

Yesterday I posted this on Facebook.  This week has been a week of ups and downs.
 
It was a good day for me today, with the exception of showing up at my bff's an hour too early. I could have sworn her x-ray was for 9:30! We had a little talk, and a hug. I went home so I could down more caffeine! After her x-ray we saw her doctor. He is so nice! He said that she should start feeling better once she starts treatment, but first she has to go and get another opinion to be sure she has the best possible option. So, Tuesday, she should begin. Anyway, she had to schedule a return appointment, but was in the restroom, so the nurse scheduled it with me. I told my friend we were getting her admitted to the psychiatric hospital!...LOL Got to have some giggles too.


I felt comforted knowing, that the treatment will make my friend feel better for a while.  She is so sick of feeling sick.  I wish I could help her emotionally, but I can't.  I pray and I can be there.
This weekend my life returns to normal.
We will go grocery shopping.  Tonight we will go to the new Mexican restaurant in town.  Tomorrow I will go to church.
My speech for everyone who asks me about my friend is this:  "Linda is very tired and appreciates your prayers.  That's all we know."
I am not going into detail with everyone who asks.
I am disappointed, but I am sure not as disappointed as Linda, that we will not be going to the scrapbook retreat.  I was hoping my cousin was going to come up from Florida, but she can't make it.  Well, at least we will get our money refunded, and I could really use it!
That's all I know!


Thursday, February 25, 2016

Lemons for Her Tea

I went two days without crying, but have been having horrible headaches.
 
On Monday, I went with Linda to see her oncologist.  He is very nice, and very agreeable as to our suggestion to go to a cancer center for a second opinion regarding treatment.  We discussed some of the new treatments that they have.  She has been having trouble breathing, so he decided that she should stay overnight in the hospital, get her blood thickened up and have a procedure the next morning where she could get some of the fluid by her lungs removed.  This would make it easier for her to breathe.
 
Tuesday morning I waited with her for the test.  When I left the hospital, my tummy really hurt and burned.  My psoriasis was worse. As I had to change my appliance, I started to cry.  It was like the last straw.  I cried hard.  I thought I was going to lose it.  I had also received a call that I DIDN'T have a bladder infection, but that it was the Interstitial Cystitis again.  Afraid that my Crohn's would flare up again, and that I would have a nervous breakdown, I called the clinic.
 
 
I saw the nurse practitioner and it was agreed that I could continue to wean myself off of the antidepressants, because I wasn't clinically depressed, just sad, and for good reason!  She gave me something for anxiety and for my headaches.  She also gave me a referral to the gastroenterologist, fearing that I had developed a narrowing in my intestine.
 
My  husband I went for breakfast which was nice, and later I went for a haircut for a pick me up.
 
 
My husband was making me laugh.
 
So, that's me.
 
Linda is not doing well.  She has very little appetite and is so tired all the time.  All I can do, is pick up some ice cream for her and lemons for her tea.  I love her.  I hurt.  I don't know what to do without her.  She told me I have many more friends, but I don't feel like I do.  I feel so alone in my pain.
 


Saturday, February 20, 2016

The Storms of Life

I cried my eyes out yesterday.  (I'm not the only one).  I do not "pretty cry"
like in the movies, no, I "ugly cry" and today my eyes are quite puffy even
though I put an ice pack on them.
 
I got very bad news.  No, it's not me, but my bff.  Her cancer is back, and it's back with a vengeance!
 
My first reaction is selfishly for myself.  How dare cancer try and come between me and my friend?
Life has been quite different since her first bout of cancer, but this is worse.  I lost my younger sister to cancer years ago.  I don't want to go through this again.  I have to be careful that my sorrow and stress doesn't make my Crohns flare up again.
 
I am very pissed!  (sorry, there isn't a stronger word).  My friend had celebrated a year without cancer.  Although she got heart disease from the chemo, she did what she was told.  She took the medicines, ate a low sodium diet, had all the tests, exercised and was embracing a healthy life style.
 
Cancer cells are sneaky.  They lay dormant and then POW!  There is no rhyme or reason.  You don't have to have a family history, you can live a healthy life....it doesn't care.  It doesn't care if you are young or old.  It doesn't care if you have people who love you.  It doesn't care if you have more living to do!
 
I pray.  My friends pray.  Our church prays.   What will be, will be. 
 
It is the old "why do bad things happen to good people?"  There is no real reason.
When sin entered into this world, so did disease, death and destruction.
God promises to be with us through it all.  He is with my friend, with me, with you.
 
"I will never leave you or forsake you."
Hebrews 3:5
 
God promises to be with us throughout the Bible, to comfort us, to care for us,
to walk us through the storms of life.
 


Saturday, February 6, 2016

Just Another Week in the Life!

These are all the wonderful things I got when I had my Stampin Up party!
 
 
Three 12x12 packs of paper, one 8 1/2x11 pack of paper, four stamp sets, one die cut that matches the stamp set, 5 rolls of washi tape (it rolled off the pile) and embellishments for shaker cards!  It was over $70 value!
 
Last Monday was my first day at the thrift store.  It is harder than it looks.  It can get quite busy, and I will have to look up the prices of everything.  The people there are very nice and helpful.  There is a break room too with coffee, water and soda (for a quarter) in the fridge, and people bring donuts and cookies, etc.
 
Tuesday we were suppose to have Red Hats, but it was cancelled due to Snow Storm Bucky.  We only got 2-3" but it go quite windy.
 
Thursday I volunteered at the Senior Center.  The person in charge of volunteering reprimanded me for saying something negative to another volunteer about my volunteer driving experience.  I wish I could just keep my mouth shut.  It hurt my feelings to be criticized.  I know it is just my foolish pride being hurt, still, I don't think she likes me.  I am the type of person who wants everyone to like me.
Maybe, I just have to learn to keep my mouth shut.  At least, I know the director likes me.
 
Yesterday I went to the "Fun Bowl" at the senior center to play the games and eat lunch.  I was sitting next to a very nice lady that I would like to get to know better.   I think I will give her a card!  She has a hard life, but you wouldn't know it by her demeanor.
 
The other night we went out for a burger.  I get "Restaurant.com" certificates by doing surveys, so this helps us out.  The three of us ended up eating for about $12 plus the tip.
 
 
Lates is very popular in Manitowoc for their burgers and deep fried cheese curds.  The cheese curds were yummy, but when I got home I did not feel good from the grease and dairy.  Oh well!  Getting old!
 
I found out my skin reacts to different adhesives on my tummy.  I started to get the blisters back.  What to do?  I am still trying to figure out which company to go with.  One company says they are better because they don't have the harsh chemicals and is sending more samples.   I hope I can get this resolved!